Tip – How conflict happens tip
Tip – Do you know why most conflict happens most conflict is set off when defensive Behavior matches defensive Behavior, when an employee a client or a subcontractor has a trigger reaction that puts them on the defense there are a few things that are happening they’re assuming something they’re judging something they’re predicting something and they are reacting to all of those things they are reacting to their assumptions their judgments and their predictions And this is where most conflict starts
so here’s a tip for you when you recognize defensive maybe even attacking Behavior get curious ask clarifying questions you could even clarify and verify but do so in a calm manner with a calm tone of voice and a non-defensive physical demeanor when you do this you give that person space to calm themselves down and you make them sink is my assumption my judgment and my expectation correct sometimes just a few well-placed questions can defuse a conflict before it even starts
so what can you do about it when you recognize right away that someone is defensive
and maybe even on that the attack you make curious ask them a question get them to clarify something lower your voice speaking a very calm manner but don’t be patronizing and don’t match defense with defense even if their assumptions are incorrect and you know it and you’re able to prove it use questions to get there, or just let it go altogether.
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